Intentional Breathing: A Simple Practice for Emotional Intelligence
Intentional Breathing: A Simple Practice for Emotional Intelligence
One of the foundations of emotional intelligence is our ability to stay present with strong emotions without being overwhelmed. Whether it's anger, anxiety, sadness, or the residue of past trauma, the ability to regulate your emotional state is key to healing, resilience, and healthy relationships.
And one of the most powerful tools for this isn’t hidden in a complex therapy model, it’s something you already carry with you every moment of the day: your breath.
Why Intentional Breathing Matters
Breathing is automatic—but it’s also intentional. This makes it a unique bridge between your body and your mind, between unconscious reactivity and conscious regulation.
When you’re stressed or anxious, your breathing tends to become shallow, rapid, and tense. Or when you are feeling shut down, numb and checked out, breathing can become slow, shallow and less engaged in diaphramitic breathing.This signals to your nervous system that something is wrong, which can elevate stress hormones, disrupt sleep and digestion, and feed the very emotional patterns you're trying to overcome. While these states have other important purposes, when they become activated through chronic emotion dysregulation, our breathing and in turn our mental and emotional state suffers.
Over time, chronic stress breathing patterns can reinforce emotional reactivity and make it harder to connect with yourself and others.
Nervous System Regulation Through Breath
Clinical research has shown that breathwork can reduce symptoms of anxiety, depression, and trauma by shifting the body into the parasympathetic “rest and digest” mode. This state supports calm, focus, digestion, and connection—what many of us are missing in our daily lives.
When you breathe fully and fluidly, you:
Calm your nervous system
Lower stress hormones like cortisol
Improve your capacity to pause and respond, rather than react
Lay the groundwork for long-term emotional health
lower your heart rate and stabalize your neurvous system intentionally
This is not just about feeling calm—it’s about building the kind of presence that allows you to have more connected, grounded relationships with others.
The Practice: Fluid Breathing
One effective method I often recomend is called fluid breathing. It’s simple, accessible, and deeply restorative. Here’s how to try it:
Inhale in 3 waves:
Belly expands (abdominal)
Ribs widen (intercostal)
Chest lifts (thoracic)
Exhale in reverse:
Chest softens
Ribs draw in
Belly gently releases
Let your breath flow like a wave: smooth, continuous, and natural. You can hold gently at the top and bottom of the breath if it feels good. There’s no need to force or control. Just breathe fully and rhythmically, retraining your body to return to the way it functions when in a state of ease, presence and homeostasis.
Why It Matters for Emotional Intelligence
Breathwork is more than a calming technique. It’s a foundational skill for emotional intelligence. When you can notice your internal state, stay present through intensity, and regulate your nervous system in the moment, you're able to:
Recognize what you’re feeling
Pause before reacting
Choose a response that aligns with your values
Stay connected—to yourself and others—even when things get hard
This ability changes how you relate to your partner, your children, your colleagues—and most importantly, yourself.
Small Practice, Big Impact
Just a few minutes of intentional breathing each day can:
Improve emotional balance
Calm anxiety and overwhelm
Support trauma recovery
Strengthen your ability to regulate in relationships
This is healing for everyone and particularly for those who may have grown up without the tools to work with strong emotions. Practices like fluid breathing can help rebuild a sense of safety and control, internally and relationally.
A Foundation for Real Well-Being
Healing doesn’t only begin with words. Often it begins with the body, with a single breath done well.
Fluid breathing is easy to learn, feels good to do, and is supported by clinical research. It helps re-establish a calm baseline in the body and lays a powerful foundation for emotional resilience and relational health.
Whether you’re working through trauma, anger, or emotional dysregulation, learning to breathe with awareness can be a meaningful first step toward a better relationship with yourself and with the people in your life.
If what you read here resonates with you, schedule a free 20 minute consultation or your first therapy session today. Click here
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Aideyan et al., A Practitioner’s Guide to Breathwork in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. (2020).
Andrico, F., Breathe As You Are. (2017).
